As I sat in class, I realized how much time has passed by. I am senior in college, and I plan on graduating in the fall. Today, showed me how much I still need to learn and experience to be ready for the “real world”
The “real world” scares me, it haunts me, and teases me. No matter how much I feel I am ready to graduate, I feel I would never be ready for what the future holds. It scares me knowing that I could fail, it scares me that after a hard four years I might not get a career that I am working hard for.
My family and friends say, just focus on the present. If you focus on what is in front of you now then the big things will happen for you. I feel that is just me personally, I always focus on the future, I always think of things before, decisions are even made. I look at all aspects of a situation and figure out all outcomes. I don’t know why I do, I have been doing that since I could remember.
I sometimes drive myself crazy, but is it wrong to worry? Graduating in the fall, is a challenge. You feel that you need to soak everything in, trying to fit all those “last first times” keeping up with your friends, and staying on top of your school work. You want to experience as much as you can, because college is the glory days of having fun and feeling young forever.
Taking my law exam and ending the day with a poor grade. I find myself thinking, am I truly ready? Maybe, it is just the first weeks of the semester just piling up, but I have nothing to fall back on.
That is what’s scary. You have nothing to fall back on, you only have yourself and it is up to you, to figure out your path. Since kindergarten, school is all we know and now you are transitioning into a phase where you have no safety net.
What I learned today, is to keep working hard, and turning the negative thoughts into positive ones, so that can be the catalyst in myself and hopefully a bright future.